I think a lot of teenagers experience boughts of depression. It just comes with the territory. I admit I was very depressed from 15 through 17, on and off. Having her as a mother didn't help.
We fought. Often. Maybe even daily. There were weekend blowouts, screaming matches and her total destruction of the house. There were times I wished I was dead because that would have felt better than living with her. I would tell her this. I would scream this. I needed her to see she was hurting me.
She would often call the police on me. A couple of times she tried to have me committed to a mental institution. At around 15 she took me to a mental hospital and tried to make them take me. I remember sitting in the waiting room. Lying to the nurses to make me look worse than I was. Maybe she was trying to scare me. She succeeded. Maybe she was scared. I really wished to be dead because of how miserable she was making me. I'd never do it though. She never thought it was her though. Never thought she could be the source of my depression. Or at least an accomplice with teenage hormones.
They never took me of course. I was a teenager fighting with her crazy mother. I wasn't a threat to anyone and I'd never actually attempted suicide. Maybe I did. I tried to cut my wrists. Not in a serious way but for the purpose of feeling something other than the veil of depression and the weight of her cruelty.
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